#1: Taking a trip back
The reason for my situation and how I turned out lies directly in one or more of my past memories. Now it’s time to face them all again.
Well, that’s enough talking about the present these past few posts. I think you got an idea about who I am, my situation and what I’m looking for. I’ll be speaking much more about the present and my random thoughts throughout future posts, but for now I’m going to start getting into the reason I started this blog…dwelling into my past.
As I explained early on in the blog, the general idea is to start from my childhood, work my way through my junior high/preteen years, my teenage years, young adulthood (college), my first half of my twenties (adult) and return to this present day now. I will be talking about everything relevant that I feel has to do with my personal and sexual development. Probably a lot of my kid to preteen years will involve self discovery, learning about sex and going through puberty, while the teen years on will deal with love, dating, crushes and sexual frustration. Nothing will be censored. Much of this I’ve never talked about to another living soul, nor have I thought about in years.
By the time I am through with it, I hope I will have learned more about myself, how my personality came to be void and discover my limiting beliefs and how to eradicate them. Only then will I be free and with luck, be able to pass the final step into adulthood that has long eluded me…a sexual relationship.
With that said, it’s time to go back in time over twenty years ago. I think we’ll start when I was five.