Venus 2000: Cleaning your pipes and your wallet
The Venus 2000 is said to be the ultimate male sex toy. For $800+ dollars, it better fucking be…and clean my house and do my taxes while it’s at it.
Women get all the good sex toys. Easy to wash. Inexpensive. Creative. There doesn’t even seem to be any embarrassment or shame in society for her to have them, it’s almost accepted that you’ll find a vibrator in most women’s top dresser drawer.
Us? Male sex toys SUCK. Cheap, poorly made. Complicated. Very little pleasure. Hell, even utterly fucking ridiculous. (Blow up dolls? Seriously now.) We’re branded desperate perverts for owning them. Worst of all, to get any sort of quality, you are going to PAY.
Such as the Venus 2000. It’s basically a pump/sleeve with electro-rubber that slips over your penis and mechanically strokes you. It’s said to boast the greatest orgasm from a male sex toy, literally the male version of the sybian (made by the same company). If the idea of watching a guy use it action doesn’t bother you, this video (WARNING: adult content) I found should give you the perfect idea of how it works.
I admit that many years ago when I was overweight, especially unwanted, and tired of the hand, I had looked into one of these things. Until I saw the price. $800+ dollars…wha, wha, wha-at?! How in the hell does something like that cost that amount of money??? I put that idea immediately out of my mind, no way - no FUCKING way.
Out of curiosity the other day I looked to see if this device still existed and what it cost now. After all, as technology and manufacturing processes improve, the prices drop, right? Nope, still over $800. Closer to $900 really if you consider the control attachment and shipping.
There has to be an obscene markup there…I can’t understand how making a pump that moves up and down can cost that much. You can buy a small riding lawnmower at Lowes for that! I feel these would be one of those purchases where you feel pumped up about it when trying it out, then after it’s all over you feel like a moron for spending so much money just to get off.
Fuck, I can buy a $400 pair of boots for half the cost. And before you say that $400 for a pair of boots is equally ridiculous, consider how women notice shoes and are attracted to guy wearing a nice pair. He would be far more likelier to get more ass than a guy paying double for a Venus 2000.
curiousgirl Says:
April 8th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
a good friend of mine had a little treasure chest of fun toys…until he had family come into town..and in a panic he threw them away becase he didnt want them to accidentally find them…he was so pissed because he threw away almost 2,000 dollars in sex toys lol…
cg
The Dateable Dork Says:
April 8th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
Ok, yeah, women DO get all the good sex toys, and not only it is totally acceptable for us to have them, but it’s a total turn-on for guys. There is definitely a double standard there. As good as that guy in the video probably felt, $800 is still a shitload of money. How much do fleshlights go for? Is hands-free really worth the extra bucks?
The Virgin Says:
April 8th, 2008 at 7:08 pm
The Fleshlight is $60. I do have one and will discuss during my young adult entries.