Our prehistoric sexual programming
Humans don’t do the deed because we’re destined to meet “the one,” nor do we just do it to feel “really, really good.” We’re controlled by our genes.
I’m going to be brutally honest…I think the whole notion of waiting for the “one” is bullshit…although I think that depends on the point of view. I don’t believe in “love.” I believe in pair-bonding and people interpret that as “love.”
Our bodies and subconscious minds do not think of our partner “Oh, this is destiny. It’s meant to be. We’re going to get married, have 2.5 children and a labrador retriever and in our cottage with a white picket fence and live happily ever after!” Not *all* of that, anyway. No, when humans are attracted to each other strong enough to initiate sex, their bodies are thinking “It’s time to make a baby.”
It reminds me of a sex talk podcast once where the male host of the show talked about his romps with his wife. “For some reason when I reach orgasm, I can’t explain it…I just *feel* the need to shoot semen into her.”
That’s our primitive programming at work, and it’s not so ridiculous. Why do baby rattlesnakes know to strike at anything that’s NOT a snake mere SECONDS after it’s hatched? Speaking of snakes, in today’s society…why are we more afraid of things like snakes and spiders, when we interact with a FAR more deadlier predator that claims thousands of human lives each year…..the automobile?
Birth control in general, such as the condom, has truly freed us in many ways. We can now enjoy sex with little repercussion. We have triumphed over our genes and we’re living in a wonderful time. Other than the fears of STDs, we can fuck to our hearts content.
But keep in mind that our bodies and programming has not taken into account the advances of our modern society. After all, stuff like birth control and automobiles have only come around in the past few hundred years, how can we expect our bodies to undo possibly millions of years of programming?
Did you ever wonder why it’s so accepted for men to have multiple partners, yet women doing the same are looked negatively upon? Men feel the need to sleep around because they have a higher success of passing on their genes that way. If they have the stamina, they can impregnate ten women in ten hours if they’re that good. There is little repercussion for them having sex.
Women not so much. It takes them nine months to produce offspring at a time. If they make ONE mistake and have sex with the wrong partner, they end up paying for it. So even if they are unaware of it, on a subconscious level women are frequently “testing” men in order to make the right choice. In today’s world, she is freed from this by birth control. Yet, society will still look down upon her as a slut because it’s going against their programming.
We’ll talk about women and sex more in the future. But why I wrote the above is that I wanted to point out why men are so promiscuous and want sex so badly. I also wanted to note that women are allowed to be more sexually free in this world. This works into what I want out of my sex life.
Hot Alpha Female Says:
March 27th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Hey buddy,
This whole blog thing that you have going on is awesome.
Are you serious that you haven’t been laid yet? I reckon just find a couple of your mates who have(shouldn’t be too hard)and get them to teach you a couple of things.
But it looks like you are doing more research as to how things actually work and I’m sure if you implemented some of them they would actually work.
Sorry getting back to this post. I definately agree with what you have to say. I don’t think that we are wired to only be seeing on person.
From a biological perspective it really doesn’t make sense that a guy should stay with one woman. Because he wants to spread his genes as far and as wide as possible.
Just like when you learn the rules of attraction a lot of that is based on acting a certain way that subconsciously get the girls attracted to you on that different level.
Neways great post, thanks!
Hot Alpha Female
http://www.hotalphafemale.blogspot.com