Books: She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman
Every man should have this in his book collection…she’ll thank you for it.
I came across an interesting book that I just got through called “She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman.” I just got through it and wow…while I knew you girls were complex, I didn’t know THAT complex. But the book is very educational and encouraging for men to try oral sex. It also teaches you way more about women’s anatomy that any health class will ever teach.
One fun fact: tantra teachings state that a woman’s upper lip is considered one of the most erogenous areas of her body because of a special nerve that connects it to the clitoris. Sadly I am also a kissing virgin…well, sort of. I’ll tell that story when I get there. Something that kind of surprised me was that the author stated that breast play was more fun for the man than the woman and didn’t do much for her. I had always read that women loved breast play and massage…provided the men realized there was more to her breast(s) than the nipple.
What I particularly like about this book is that it has a section put into steps for different techniques for the beginner. I think the technique I’ll take with me is called “The Virgin’s Kiss,” appropriately. Honestly, I wish there was a book on intercourse detailed for virgins/beginners like this; every book I’ve seen already assumes you’ve done the deed and is more adventurous techniques/positions at that.
I guess one thing I’m left curious about is the use of dental dams during oral sex. Is this really a common practice? I always hear two different sides of the story, that oral sex is very risky for STD transmission, and the other one is that it’s completely not as big of a deal or a scare as people with agendas make it out to be. Many escorts allow oral sex on them without a dental dam, so that’s why I wonder.
The only thing that sucks about this book is that I was so inspired and turned on after reading it that I was rearing and ready to go. But unfortunately…there is no girl. Not even one open minded enough to let me simply practice. Then I felt stupid and wondered why I even bothered reading the book in the first place. No sense in learning algebra if you’re not using it.
That’s what blows my mind, there are lots of guys out there right now who bitch and gripe about either taking the time to pleasure their woman or giving her oral pleasure and they’re still getting laid right and left. (I know some of them personally.) Yet someone like me who is eager to part her legs and worship her with my mouth sits at home and goes completely to waste. It makes me feel like such a defective product sometimes.
Honey Says:
April 28th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Re: boobs–yeah, guys like them, and as a girl you can get turned on by how turned on your guy gets, but in and of themselves…eh.
Re: dental dams–I’ve never used one and I don’t know anyone who has. However, all the statistics about how easy it is to give/get an STD that way are totally true. Best thing to do, IMO, is to ask the other person when they were last tested.
Do guys really bitch about having to give head? I mean, a couple guys did when I/they were 18 and inexperienced. I guess I am just lucky with the BF…
bega Says:
April 29th, 2008 at 10:17 am
Girl here, and I’ve gotta say that my boobs are vital - if I don’t get any nipple play, it’s hard for me to orgasm. So don’t assume that any one opinion in any one book covers everyone!
And yeah, never used a dental dam & don’t know anyone who does.
valentine Says:
April 29th, 2008 at 11:47 am
I’ve always found the concept of using a dental damn during oral sex rather silly. Same with using a condom during a blowjob. In theory, it defeats the purpose.
The best solution is to not give oral sex to diseased strangers.
valentine Says:
April 29th, 2008 at 11:49 am
Also, my boyfiend needs this book. He’s willing, but he’s terrible. XD
valentine Says:
April 29th, 2008 at 11:51 am
Also, I’m linking to this post if you don’t mind.
The Dateable Dork Says:
April 29th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Yeah, boobs don’t really do anything for me, but I love how excited the guy I’m with gets about them. It’s like a kid in a candy store!
About dental dams - like the ladies above, I’ve never used one and don’t know anyone who has. Oral sex and contraception don’t really go together in my book, so you certainly have to be careful and honest with the person you’re with.
And no, you’re not a defective product! Just think - when you finally get the opportunity to give oral, your girl will be bragging to all her friends about your amazing technique. Hang in there. : )
The Virgin Says:
April 30th, 2008 at 12:20 am
Honey: They most certainly do. Hell, I know one of my friends who gripes to hell about simply buying condoms due to the embarrassment factor (he’s 28)…makes her do it.
Hm…interesting. Something about the safe sex/oral sex still doesn’t add up to me, but I’ll save my thoughts for a future blog post.
Mr. Queen Says:
May 7th, 2008 at 2:42 am
maybe if all else fails, an escort wouls bee willing to let u practice on her?
but that would cost money, and mke you look bad. it would be like cheating your way thru a video game, but not getting the real ending
The Virgin Says:
May 7th, 2008 at 8:12 pm
I agree Mr. Queen, I’ve said my piece on escorts quite a while back. It will be more rewarding for me to earn it.